Romney Returns


By Steve Deace

Yesterday the biggest story in the national blogosphere was 2012 Republican presidential loser Mitt Romney deciding to break radio silence by agreeing to speak at CPAC next month, which is the biggest annual gathering of conservatives in the country.

There is lots of speculation as to why Romney would choose to speak here after losing in November, and what he plans to say. Since I’ve never been shy about sharing my thoughts regarding Willard, I thought I would dip my toe in the water as well.

Here are my top 10 reasons why Romney has chosen to speak to CPAC:

10. Romney just remembered there was one more position on the sanctity of life he forgot to take.

9. Romney was confused and thought he was speaking to SUPERPAC instead.

8. By speaking in D.C., Romney can simultaneously add Virginia and Maryland to his list of “home states”, which already includes Massachusetts, Michigan, New Hampshire Utah, and California. All but one of which he lost in the election.

7. Romney needs to renew his lifelong membership to the NRA.

6. Since Gerald Ford is dead, John McCain lost his voice screaming at his anti-amnesty constituents back home, and George H.W. Bush and Bob Dole have too much dignity, it fell on Romney to give the “what not to do when running for president speech” this year.

5. Romney wants to remind us yet again that Chick-fil-a “is not a part of my campaign.”

4. Romney finally figured it was time to talk about Benghazi.

3. He’s jealous of all the positive press Karl Rove is currently getting.

2. Romney wants to make the case why self-deporting amnesty is our sure-fire way of securing more of the Hispanic vote.

1. It’s the closest he can actually get to the White House.

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